The Other Side of Retirement
One year, two years, three years and then you can leave your
job and begin a new, exciting phase of life… retirement. This is the aspect of retirement we see
advertised in commercials offered by financial planning organizations, insurance companies and even pharmaceutical
companies, to mention a few. We can do a reality check. What really happens in retirement and are we
ready? For the good times, of course we
are. For the less than good? Well, that
takes some reflection. The time after
retirement can also be a time of loss.
Big losses like the death of a parent, the poor return on investments,
the loss of our home, our health. Rather
than becoming depressed about what might happen and surrendering our normally
positive outlook to morbid preoccupation we can take inventory of the personal (not
financial) resources we have acquired over the years. They can get us through
the hard times.
Viktor Frankl, a psychotherapist who experienced the horrors
of a concentration camp during WWII in his book Man’s Search for Meaning, tells us
the last free choice we have is that of choosing our attitude in any given
situation. He used his therapeutic skills to encourage
fellow prisoners in finding a reason for living. For Frankl it was the memory
of his wife. We recently saw many New Yorkers, perhaps ourselves among them,
exemplify the decisive choice of getting
up, brushing themselves off with courageous determination to rebuild a home, get to a job or extend themselves to less
fortunate neighbors during Hurricane Sandy.
Because life makes no promises, we can only be ready by schooling
ourselves in ways of thinking that support us in even the most trying event.
Another resource we can bring to life in retirement is our
energy whether it be great or lessening.
It may be that after a good night’s sleep and a hearty breakfast our
energy is at its peak. That’s a good
time to plan activities, make phone calls or tackle an unpleasant task. A nap after lunch followed by 20 minutes of
moderate exercise can be just the thing to bring us through the rest of the day
with energy.
Thirdly, staying connected to family and friends keeps us in
touch with those we love. We don’t need
to wait for a return phone call or feel it necessary to plan a movie or lunch
date. It feels great just to have a long
conversation without ending it with, “We must get together”. In times like these when those we care about may
live far away we’ll be happier knowing what’s happening with our children and
grandchildren. They will be grateful for
this sign of affection even across the miles and we will be making use of our
most powerful resource, our love for one another.
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