In a junior high
school in the heart of the Bronx 15 years ago, nearly half of the African
American students were being raised by their grandparents. Nobody asked why,
nor was this alarming to any of the teachers or other students. While this
anecdote isn’t the norm, the number of children being raised by their
grandparents is growing. There are now about nearly 6 million children living
in a grandparent’s house in the United States, a growth of over 50% from just
10 years ago.
Traditionally, grandparents take
charge of children in cases of illness, parental abandonment, teen pregnancies,
substance abuse, homelessness, incarceration, death of a parent, child abuse
and neglect, poverty and divorce. The recession of the last few years has
increased the number of parents who are not able to provide for their children
and since over 70% of the grandparents taking care of children own their home,
most baby boomers are better off financially than the rest of the population,
at least in the time being. However, in homes with only the grandmother as the
caregiver, the average income is around $20,000 a year.
It’s hard to
overstate the effect that raising children can have on a population that
already has to deal with health concerns and planning for or entering
retirement. With 20% of them living in poverty, some are unable to retire or
have to retire later in order to make ends meet. When the need for grandparents
being the caretakers comes suddenly, older adults do not have time to plan for
the proper care or the financial logistics of taking care of a child. Many do
not have power of attorney to make decisions for the child. Educational and
medical consent laws differ by state. If the household has not had any children
living in it for a long time, it may not be safe for small children. These are
issues that may not be in the mind of an overwhelmed grandparent.
In a time when the
“sandwich generation,” –characterized by middle age parents also taking care of
their parents– is mentioned as a growing social problem, the issue of
grandparents as caregivers is also a serious one. There aren’t many programs aimed at helping
them. Exacerbating the problem is that custodial grandparents tend to be on the
younger end, and therefore are still at an age when they could be working
themselves, creating a problem of child care. Even worse, a new trend is that
of the “club sandwich,” described as people in their 50s and 60s who are tasked
with taking care of three generations, and are stuck between their
grandchildren, adult children and aging parents. The feeling of being closed-in
from so many directions can lead to depression. There is a page on Facebook
titled “Red Button Presents: The Sandwich Generation Discussion.” The
administrator, who was part of the sandwich generation herself, did not have
time to continue running the page and it has fallen into disuse. This small
example shows how little time we may have for the things we like to do once we
have to take care of another person.
One option for
people in the sandwich generation with elderly parents is an adult day health
care program, where their loved one can be picked up in the morning, spend the
day at the day care facility, and be taken back home in the afternoon. This
could alleviate the stress of having to care for multiple family members,
especially if they are of very different ages. Home care services may also
help, depending on the level of need. When children are not in school or still
too young for it, a caregiving grandparent may get help from a child care
program. Research shows that a child’s attachment to a parent or guardian will
not be negatively affected by being in child day care as long as they have a
loving caregiver.
According to a
survey done by Caring.com, 69% of caregivers say that caring for a loved one is
their biggest source of stress. 3 in 4 caregivers have had to change jobs to
better deal with their circumstances There are few programs to help those
caring for their grandchildren or children and elderly parents. This CNN Money
has a good list of online resources: http://money.cnn.com/2007/02/20/magazines/moneymag/tug_of_war.moneymag/index.htm
Additionally, there is legal, financial and caregiving support information for grandparents raising children here: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/help_for_grandparents_raising_grandchildren.htm
The New York City Department for the Aging has a Grandparent Resource Center: http://www.nyc.gov/html/dfta/html/caregiver/grandparents.shtml
Here
at Isabella Geriatric Center, we have Adult Day Health Care, Home Care and Child
Day Care, all of which you can find at http://www.isabella.org/
under the “Programs” tab.
